Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Qualifying as a Parent

I was the last person I'd expect to be a father.
And yet it happened.
I fell in love.
We got married.
And the baby came.
2 of them, in fact.
And another on the way.
The joke among the gang of Tigers is that, I'm the most "productive" compared to the other 17 fellows.
The crux of the matter is this. Having a child doesn't really make you a parent.
Some people confuse that by fathering a baby (biologically), you automatically become a parent.
NO. Doesn't work that way.
The first thing is to take care of baby's needs.
Food, milk, diapers.
Not to mention if they fall sick. (Ethan / Ewan, I would suggest one of you being a paeditrician in the future, they're really raking in the bucks).
The second thing is education.
There's the "formal" education like kindergarten, pre-school and then the schooling.
The "informal" part is tough. This is where parenting skills come in.
No one knows how you get these skills. But somehow, you have to rely on your own good sense to teach them what's right and what's wrong.
What if you have a stubborn kid? Like my 2 boys.
Then you learn the art of Patience. If not, you'd probably killed yourself by now.
I don't even want to enter the domain of "joint parenting" where you and your spouse hold the status of "co-parent". Let's just stick to one-to-one parenting first.
I was wondering how did my parents deal with me. Then I realised that my boys are exactly the way I was when I was their age.
Yes, Daddy, I made you a grandparent and the best reward for you now is to watch me mess it up as a parent.
Hopefuly I won't mess up too much.
In any case, I realised that being a parent means spending time with your kids. In today's society, I see that as a luxury among too many people.
Which is a very sad situation, actually.
I tell some of my ex-accounting colleagues that we left the Firm so that we could have MORE time.
My point here is that I see the boys still wanting to spend time with me until they're probably 7 when they enter Primary school. Then they'll have a new world of their own and will probably start ignoring their old man.
That's why every second I spend with them is worth an ounce of gold.
As usual, a quote to end (what changes in 2000 years of civilisation, I mean, really?)

Children today are tyrants. They contradict their parent, gobble their food, and tyrannize their teachers.
- Socrates (469-399 BC)

1 comment:

Zheng Zhilong said...

Good Looking boys