When you have become a success, you learn that what you did was the right thing in attaining your goal.
When you fail, you learn who your real supporters are.
Either way, you never lose.
- Bobby K.H. Ong
Thursday, July 29, 2010
The main issue of the Malaysian labor market and the Solution
I wanted to write this after I had given the solution to the issue of the Malaysian education system.
No solution, especially when it is the right one, will be easy to implement.
But I had no time after my businesses were launched one by one.
So hear me out on this first.
Apparently there are approximately 30 THOUSAND graduates out there without a job.
Surely, this must be an improvement.
It wasn't that long ago when I heard the government wanted to help 80 THOUSAND graduates who were unemployed at the time.
Or maybe the government statistics center hired better statisticians. Whatever.
I had hired a 50 year old man in my home improvement center.
Remember when I said that it gave me a jolt that this guy could speak perfect English and not get a job?
I know tons of graduates who can't speak that well and still somehow managed to get a job.
Coming back to this guy, he has ample working experience.
How is it that he was jobless for 6 months prior to coming for an interview with me?
He has good work ethics, is always punctual and shows a good desire to learn although at the age of 50.
The problem with the unemployed in Malaysia is SIMPLE.
It's all to with ATTITUDE.
The batch of employees I have now is my 3rd batch of people.
They comprise of a SPM school leaver, a former mechanic, a former Sony employee and the 50 year old guy who's gone through a myriad of jobs.
Today's young people think the world OWES THEM a job.
When they graduate from a local university that is not even ranked within the top 100 universities in the world, they think they must be entitled to:
1. An air-conditioned cubicle
2. A Dell PC with the best specifications
3. Enough work spare time for them to Facebook (at least 3 hours)
So, how?
The solution:
FORCE them into jobs.
Do NOT give them ALLOWANCES under the pretext of Retraining etc. This is akin to a parent still giving pocket money to a grown-up child.
Round ALL these unemployed "graduates" up and get them into jobs.
My ex-employer, Westports, has vacancies. Let me know if you're interested in learning about logistics and how a world-class port is run.
I applied there as an EXECUTIVE after I had obtained my European MBA.
I knew that if I were to go in, I must start learning from the bottom.
Ask my wife.
Ask her how I coped with working the midnight shift.
That's right, the GRAVEYARD shift.
So, all these brilliant young people can't find a job?
Really?
After my SRP exam, I pumped petrol for RM 1 an hour.
After my SPM, I washed dishes at the Tai Thong restaurant for RM300 a month.
They weren't called work, I called it a job opportunity.
It's high time the "graduates" learn what life is about.
It's not about working in KL so that you can go and hang out in Zouk after you finish work.
It's about balancing your paycheck with your monthly costs.
And how you'll upgrade your skills with on the job training.
Skills you will NOT find in a textbook or in a college.
I would suggest getting the GLCs and the MNCs to help out on this exercise.
Let the "graduate" find out what it's like to be operating a machine at the factory while standing for 8 hours.
The government must issue a notice, that within 6 months of graduation,
these graduates must have either:
1. secured a job, or
2. show proof of job hunting, application forms etc.
If not, shove them into a job where they will be given a choice of factories, MNCs etc.
That will teach them the value of money and also give them direction in life.
I am willing to bet that this will "spur" the graduates into action and suddenly they will be "earnestly" be searching for jobs.
The only party who will be faulting me, will be Star Publications who will be making less than the RM5 million a month they currently get from the Jobs advertisements.
There, if only the government is willing to do this, we will have a bustling local labor market and less Bangladeshis, Indonesians, Myanmars, Vietnamese, Phillipinos, Nepalis and whatever nationality out there willing to work hard for the money.
Problem solved.
No solution, especially when it is the right one, will be easy to implement.
But I had no time after my businesses were launched one by one.
So hear me out on this first.
Apparently there are approximately 30 THOUSAND graduates out there without a job.
Surely, this must be an improvement.
It wasn't that long ago when I heard the government wanted to help 80 THOUSAND graduates who were unemployed at the time.
Or maybe the government statistics center hired better statisticians. Whatever.
I had hired a 50 year old man in my home improvement center.
Remember when I said that it gave me a jolt that this guy could speak perfect English and not get a job?
I know tons of graduates who can't speak that well and still somehow managed to get a job.
Coming back to this guy, he has ample working experience.
How is it that he was jobless for 6 months prior to coming for an interview with me?
He has good work ethics, is always punctual and shows a good desire to learn although at the age of 50.
The problem with the unemployed in Malaysia is SIMPLE.
It's all to with ATTITUDE.
The batch of employees I have now is my 3rd batch of people.
They comprise of a SPM school leaver, a former mechanic, a former Sony employee and the 50 year old guy who's gone through a myriad of jobs.
Today's young people think the world OWES THEM a job.
When they graduate from a local university that is not even ranked within the top 100 universities in the world, they think they must be entitled to:
1. An air-conditioned cubicle
2. A Dell PC with the best specifications
3. Enough work spare time for them to Facebook (at least 3 hours)
So, how?
The solution:
FORCE them into jobs.
Do NOT give them ALLOWANCES under the pretext of Retraining etc. This is akin to a parent still giving pocket money to a grown-up child.
Round ALL these unemployed "graduates" up and get them into jobs.
My ex-employer, Westports, has vacancies. Let me know if you're interested in learning about logistics and how a world-class port is run.
I applied there as an EXECUTIVE after I had obtained my European MBA.
I knew that if I were to go in, I must start learning from the bottom.
Ask my wife.
Ask her how I coped with working the midnight shift.
That's right, the GRAVEYARD shift.
So, all these brilliant young people can't find a job?
Really?
After my SRP exam, I pumped petrol for RM 1 an hour.
After my SPM, I washed dishes at the Tai Thong restaurant for RM300 a month.
They weren't called work, I called it a job opportunity.
It's high time the "graduates" learn what life is about.
It's not about working in KL so that you can go and hang out in Zouk after you finish work.
It's about balancing your paycheck with your monthly costs.
And how you'll upgrade your skills with on the job training.
Skills you will NOT find in a textbook or in a college.
I would suggest getting the GLCs and the MNCs to help out on this exercise.
Let the "graduate" find out what it's like to be operating a machine at the factory while standing for 8 hours.
The government must issue a notice, that within 6 months of graduation,
these graduates must have either:
1. secured a job, or
2. show proof of job hunting, application forms etc.
If not, shove them into a job where they will be given a choice of factories, MNCs etc.
That will teach them the value of money and also give them direction in life.
I am willing to bet that this will "spur" the graduates into action and suddenly they will be "earnestly" be searching for jobs.
The only party who will be faulting me, will be Star Publications who will be making less than the RM5 million a month they currently get from the Jobs advertisements.
There, if only the government is willing to do this, we will have a bustling local labor market and less Bangladeshis, Indonesians, Myanmars, Vietnamese, Phillipinos, Nepalis and whatever nationality out there willing to work hard for the money.
Problem solved.
Monday, July 26, 2010
Wise Words by Harry Truman
Work Hard
Do your best
Keep your word
Never get too big for your britches
Trust in God
Have no fear
and Never forget a friend.
- Harry S. Truman
Do your best
Keep your word
Never get too big for your britches
Trust in God
Have no fear
and Never forget a friend.
- Harry S. Truman
Thursday, July 22, 2010
What I've Learned...
This is not the usual stuff, but a real hilarious one.
I love the honesty and frankness of it all. Modified it to fit our Malaysian situation.
What I've Learned...
from http://open.salon.com/blog/cranky_cuss
I DON’T understand people who don’t like to read. The opportunity to learn new information is what gets me out of bed every morning. That and a full bladder.
MY favorite time is Sunday morning. While my family sleeps in, I brew a pot of coffee, turn on my Astro Byond, and curl up with the Sunday paper. It’s bliss.
BUT don’t mistake me for a morning person. When my bladder gets me up on Saturday morning, and I realize I can climb back under the covers, it’s like Christmas in July.
THE producer of the TV series Arrested Development joked about giving one of his characters “an antiquated disease like gout.”
My brother gets periodic attacks of gout, so there ain’t nothing antiquated about it, bub. I've seen him hurt like a son-of-a-bitch.
WHEN you’re young, you take your body for granted. When you’re older, your body takes revenge.
WHOEVER coined the phrase “the golden years” must have been a doctor. Or his accountant.
THE greatest Beatles album: Revolver. But ask me again next week and I might give a different answer.
PAUL McCARTNEY’S messy divorce from Heather Mills was the biggest surprise since the trooper smelled marijuana on Willie Nelson’s tour bus.
IF an alien tried to figure out life on Earth by watching our prime-time TV shows, he’d think we’re a nation of serial killers and child molesters.
HE’D also think teenagers are all sullen, Playstation-addicted druggies who lost their virginity at 13 because they’re angry at their workaholic parents for never being home. In real life, I’ve never met this family.
HAVING had two boys of my own, I’ve met a lot of other children, and most of them are thoughtful and caring. Our future is in good hands.
THERE ARE tons of books of parenting advice from the “experts.”
My advice: 1) buy all of the books; 2) stack them up in the middle of your lawn; 3) light a match.
IF I were writing a parenting book, it would be one page long: Don’t be an asshole.
Meaning: don’t abuse drugs or alcohol, don’t abuse your kids or spouse, don’t have dish-throwing arguments, don’t cheat on your spouse.
I’d throw in a couple of common sense items like, pay attention to your kids once in a while and attend parent-teacher conferences.
If you can do that, you’re 98% of the way toward being a successful parent.
Of course, it also helps to be financially secure.
I’M STILL BLOWN AWAY by Wesley Autrey, the guy who jumped on the subway tracks to shield a stranger while the subway cars went over them. To instinctively respond like that is just mind-boggling. But what amazes me is that, when EMS and the police arrived, he just got up and walked away, like he had just stopped to pick up a newspaper. He’s received a couple of awards, but they should give one to his parents, too, because somehow they instilled extraordinary values in their son.
MY favorite beer is Sam Adams, but I boycotted them for a year because they sponsored a radio stunt that involved a couple having sex in St. Patrick’s Cathedral. I didn’t even tell my wife about my boycott. Doing something out of moral conviction shouldn’t require positive feedback.
IF YOU NEED to let people know you’ve done a good deed, then you’ve done it for the wrong reasons. Unless you’re Bill Gates or Bono shaming us into giving more.
I SAW a documentary on the killing of Emmett Till, and it was nauseating to think we tolerated that level of hatred and brutality only 50 years ago.
Remember that whenever someone talks about “the good old days.”
I KNOW America still has racial issues, but it also tries to absorb more different cultures than any country ever. Walk through a mall near me and you’ll see whites, blacks, Latinos and Asians of all nationalities and all ages, and I think it’s great. I enjoy the incongruities – Arabs wearing hockey jerseys, Chinese girls serving Cajun food, Koreans calling me “dude.” I recently saw a black teenager wearing a Mister Rogers T-shirt.
THE FRENCH were contemptuous of American racism, but look at the trouble they’re having now with their own Muslim immigrants. It’s easy to pretend to be tolerant when your community is homogenous.
IN SPORTS, I always root for the underdog because I believe in an egalitarian world.
I want as many people as possible to have some success.
Rooting for Manchester United or Liverpool feels like rooting for the old boys’ network, rooting for sealed borders, rooting for the status quo.
The WORLD should be about open doors and fresh blood.
WE ROOT PASSIONATELY for our team and boo the opponent, but sometimes we forget that the players are just young guys trying to make a living. One of my favorite sports moments occurred in the last two minutes of the 1995 Stanley Cup finals. TV cameras showed Mike Peluso, the toughest guy on the New Jersey Devils – a team I root against – sitting on the bench, looking up at the scoreboard. As he realized he was about to achieve his lifelong dream of winning a Stanley Cup, he began to cry. So did I.
ALL YOU NEED TO KNOW about gluttony in America is that, in many fast-food joints, there is no small-size drink – only medium, large, and extra-large. And they now have to make bigger straws for the drinks.
MOST USELESS INVENTION? The escalator. It’s the law of unintended consequences. It was supposed to speed up foot traffic, but it actually slows it down and causes more congestion, because everyone rides it like it’s an elevator. And thus people are lazier and get less exercise.
I HAVE A LIBERTARIAN BIAS against seat belt and motorcycle helmet laws, but if you’re not wearing a seat belt or motorcycle helmet, what the hell is wrong with you?
I HAVE NEVER spent more than $40 on a watch. Never will. How much more accurate can a $1000 watch be – a half-second? And if your cell phone gives the time, who the hell needs a watch?
I’VE KNOWN SOME PEOPLE who have committed suicide.
You know how they say that God never puts more on your shoulders than you can bear? That’s bullshit.
LIKE MANY PEOPLE, suicide crossed my mind occasionally in moments of despair. And like with many people, the thought quickly disappeared. But if you’ve never had to, at least once, fight the urge to crawl back under the covers in a fetal position, with all the lights off, the doors locked and the phones off the hook, then you’re blessed. Or dense.
GREAT QUOTE on religion from Michael Shermer: “So it turns out there are 10,000 gods and yet only one right one. That means we're all atheists on 9,999 gods. The only difference between me and the believers is I'm an atheist on one more god.”
WHAT WOULD JESUS DO?
I know what he would NOT do: Drive a humongous car. Sport expensive bling-bling. Trade the mother of his children in for a trophy wife. Give even one second’s thought to the estate tax. Campaign for lethal injection. Start a war in the Middle East.
AN EXAMPLE OF LUCK: Kurt Vonnegut and baseball Hall-of-Famer Warren Spahn both fought in World War II’s Battle of the Bulge. 19,000 Americans died in that battle. What if Vonnegut and Spahn had not survived? We would never have had Slaughterhouse-5, and someone else would be the winningest left-handed pitcher of all time. And among those 19,000, did we lose any potential Vonneguts or Spahns?
MY PERFECT DAY OFF? A few hours spent writing, a couple of hours spent reading a good book, a couple of new CDs on my headphones, surfing the Net for news, a couple of household chores completed, a nice meal with my family at a modest Italian restaurant, a classic movie on my DVD player, The Daily Show with Jon Stewart, a little light reading, and 8 hours of sleep. Unfortunately, there’s only 24 hours in a day, and there’s a ballgame on ESPN and a bag of Doritos calling my name.
TRUST me, if you have an opportunity and let it pass out of fear of failure, you’ll feel much worse than if you seize the opportunity and fail.
THE MORE I learn, the more I realize I don’t know.
CHALLENGE your beliefs regularly. Even Einstein was wrong sometimes. And you’re not Einstein.
I love the honesty and frankness of it all. Modified it to fit our Malaysian situation.
What I've Learned...
from http://open.salon.com/blog/cranky_cuss
I DON’T understand people who don’t like to read. The opportunity to learn new information is what gets me out of bed every morning. That and a full bladder.
MY favorite time is Sunday morning. While my family sleeps in, I brew a pot of coffee, turn on my Astro Byond, and curl up with the Sunday paper. It’s bliss.
BUT don’t mistake me for a morning person. When my bladder gets me up on Saturday morning, and I realize I can climb back under the covers, it’s like Christmas in July.
THE producer of the TV series Arrested Development joked about giving one of his characters “an antiquated disease like gout.”
My brother gets periodic attacks of gout, so there ain’t nothing antiquated about it, bub. I've seen him hurt like a son-of-a-bitch.
WHEN you’re young, you take your body for granted. When you’re older, your body takes revenge.
WHOEVER coined the phrase “the golden years” must have been a doctor. Or his accountant.
THE greatest Beatles album: Revolver. But ask me again next week and I might give a different answer.
PAUL McCARTNEY’S messy divorce from Heather Mills was the biggest surprise since the trooper smelled marijuana on Willie Nelson’s tour bus.
IF an alien tried to figure out life on Earth by watching our prime-time TV shows, he’d think we’re a nation of serial killers and child molesters.
HE’D also think teenagers are all sullen, Playstation-addicted druggies who lost their virginity at 13 because they’re angry at their workaholic parents for never being home. In real life, I’ve never met this family.
HAVING had two boys of my own, I’ve met a lot of other children, and most of them are thoughtful and caring. Our future is in good hands.
THERE ARE tons of books of parenting advice from the “experts.”
My advice: 1) buy all of the books; 2) stack them up in the middle of your lawn; 3) light a match.
IF I were writing a parenting book, it would be one page long: Don’t be an asshole.
Meaning: don’t abuse drugs or alcohol, don’t abuse your kids or spouse, don’t have dish-throwing arguments, don’t cheat on your spouse.
I’d throw in a couple of common sense items like, pay attention to your kids once in a while and attend parent-teacher conferences.
If you can do that, you’re 98% of the way toward being a successful parent.
Of course, it also helps to be financially secure.
I’M STILL BLOWN AWAY by Wesley Autrey, the guy who jumped on the subway tracks to shield a stranger while the subway cars went over them. To instinctively respond like that is just mind-boggling. But what amazes me is that, when EMS and the police arrived, he just got up and walked away, like he had just stopped to pick up a newspaper. He’s received a couple of awards, but they should give one to his parents, too, because somehow they instilled extraordinary values in their son.
MY favorite beer is Sam Adams, but I boycotted them for a year because they sponsored a radio stunt that involved a couple having sex in St. Patrick’s Cathedral. I didn’t even tell my wife about my boycott. Doing something out of moral conviction shouldn’t require positive feedback.
IF YOU NEED to let people know you’ve done a good deed, then you’ve done it for the wrong reasons. Unless you’re Bill Gates or Bono shaming us into giving more.
I SAW a documentary on the killing of Emmett Till, and it was nauseating to think we tolerated that level of hatred and brutality only 50 years ago.
Remember that whenever someone talks about “the good old days.”
I KNOW America still has racial issues, but it also tries to absorb more different cultures than any country ever. Walk through a mall near me and you’ll see whites, blacks, Latinos and Asians of all nationalities and all ages, and I think it’s great. I enjoy the incongruities – Arabs wearing hockey jerseys, Chinese girls serving Cajun food, Koreans calling me “dude.” I recently saw a black teenager wearing a Mister Rogers T-shirt.
THE FRENCH were contemptuous of American racism, but look at the trouble they’re having now with their own Muslim immigrants. It’s easy to pretend to be tolerant when your community is homogenous.
IN SPORTS, I always root for the underdog because I believe in an egalitarian world.
I want as many people as possible to have some success.
Rooting for Manchester United or Liverpool feels like rooting for the old boys’ network, rooting for sealed borders, rooting for the status quo.
The WORLD should be about open doors and fresh blood.
WE ROOT PASSIONATELY for our team and boo the opponent, but sometimes we forget that the players are just young guys trying to make a living. One of my favorite sports moments occurred in the last two minutes of the 1995 Stanley Cup finals. TV cameras showed Mike Peluso, the toughest guy on the New Jersey Devils – a team I root against – sitting on the bench, looking up at the scoreboard. As he realized he was about to achieve his lifelong dream of winning a Stanley Cup, he began to cry. So did I.
ALL YOU NEED TO KNOW about gluttony in America is that, in many fast-food joints, there is no small-size drink – only medium, large, and extra-large. And they now have to make bigger straws for the drinks.
MOST USELESS INVENTION? The escalator. It’s the law of unintended consequences. It was supposed to speed up foot traffic, but it actually slows it down and causes more congestion, because everyone rides it like it’s an elevator. And thus people are lazier and get less exercise.
I HAVE A LIBERTARIAN BIAS against seat belt and motorcycle helmet laws, but if you’re not wearing a seat belt or motorcycle helmet, what the hell is wrong with you?
I HAVE NEVER spent more than $40 on a watch. Never will. How much more accurate can a $1000 watch be – a half-second? And if your cell phone gives the time, who the hell needs a watch?
I’VE KNOWN SOME PEOPLE who have committed suicide.
You know how they say that God never puts more on your shoulders than you can bear? That’s bullshit.
LIKE MANY PEOPLE, suicide crossed my mind occasionally in moments of despair. And like with many people, the thought quickly disappeared. But if you’ve never had to, at least once, fight the urge to crawl back under the covers in a fetal position, with all the lights off, the doors locked and the phones off the hook, then you’re blessed. Or dense.
GREAT QUOTE on religion from Michael Shermer: “So it turns out there are 10,000 gods and yet only one right one. That means we're all atheists on 9,999 gods. The only difference between me and the believers is I'm an atheist on one more god.”
WHAT WOULD JESUS DO?
I know what he would NOT do: Drive a humongous car. Sport expensive bling-bling. Trade the mother of his children in for a trophy wife. Give even one second’s thought to the estate tax. Campaign for lethal injection. Start a war in the Middle East.
AN EXAMPLE OF LUCK: Kurt Vonnegut and baseball Hall-of-Famer Warren Spahn both fought in World War II’s Battle of the Bulge. 19,000 Americans died in that battle. What if Vonnegut and Spahn had not survived? We would never have had Slaughterhouse-5, and someone else would be the winningest left-handed pitcher of all time. And among those 19,000, did we lose any potential Vonneguts or Spahns?
MY PERFECT DAY OFF? A few hours spent writing, a couple of hours spent reading a good book, a couple of new CDs on my headphones, surfing the Net for news, a couple of household chores completed, a nice meal with my family at a modest Italian restaurant, a classic movie on my DVD player, The Daily Show with Jon Stewart, a little light reading, and 8 hours of sleep. Unfortunately, there’s only 24 hours in a day, and there’s a ballgame on ESPN and a bag of Doritos calling my name.
TRUST me, if you have an opportunity and let it pass out of fear of failure, you’ll feel much worse than if you seize the opportunity and fail.
THE MORE I learn, the more I realize I don’t know.
CHALLENGE your beliefs regularly. Even Einstein was wrong sometimes. And you’re not Einstein.
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
Eight gifts that cost nothing!
1. THE GIFT OF LISTENING...
But you must REALLY listen.
No interrupting, no daydreaming,
No planning your response.
Just listening.
2. THE GIFT OF AFFECTION...
Be generous with appropriate hugs,
Kisses, pats on the back, and handholds.
Let these small actions demonstrate the
Love you have for family and friends.
3. THE GIFT OF LAUGHTER...
Clip cartoons.
Share articles and funny stories.
Your gift will say, "I love to laugh with you."
4. THE GIFT OF A WRITTEN NOTE...
It can be a simple
"Thanks for the help" note or a full sonnet.
A brief, handwritten note may be remembered
For a lifetime, and may even change a life.
5. THE GIFT OF A COMPLIMENT.. .
A simple and sincere,
"You look great in red,"
"You did a super job,"
Or "That was a wonderful meal"
Can make some one's day.
6. THE GIFT OF A FAVOR...
Every day, go out of your way
To do something kind.
7. THE GIFT OF SOLITUDE...
There are times when we want nothing better
Than to be left alone.
Be sensitive to those times and give
The gift of solitude to others.
8. THE GIFT OF A CHEERFUL DISPOSITION. ..
The easiest way to feel good is
To extend a kind word to someone.
Really, it's not that hard to say it.
But you must REALLY listen.
No interrupting, no daydreaming,
No planning your response.
Just listening.
2. THE GIFT OF AFFECTION...
Be generous with appropriate hugs,
Kisses, pats on the back, and handholds.
Let these small actions demonstrate the
Love you have for family and friends.
3. THE GIFT OF LAUGHTER...
Clip cartoons.
Share articles and funny stories.
Your gift will say, "I love to laugh with you."
4. THE GIFT OF A WRITTEN NOTE...
It can be a simple
"Thanks for the help" note or a full sonnet.
A brief, handwritten note may be remembered
For a lifetime, and may even change a life.
5. THE GIFT OF A COMPLIMENT.. .
A simple and sincere,
"You look great in red,"
"You did a super job,"
Or "That was a wonderful meal"
Can make some one's day.
6. THE GIFT OF A FAVOR...
Every day, go out of your way
To do something kind.
7. THE GIFT OF SOLITUDE...
There are times when we want nothing better
Than to be left alone.
Be sensitive to those times and give
The gift of solitude to others.
8. THE GIFT OF A CHEERFUL DISPOSITION. ..
The easiest way to feel good is
To extend a kind word to someone.
Really, it's not that hard to say it.
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
The ABC of Love
Always kiss each other upon departing.
Be there for her. always.
Create an evironment of love.
Do it. now.
Escape from the society.
Fight fair.
Give of your time.
Handle with care.
Inspire your partner with your thoughts.
Judge not.
Keep your good memories alive.
Listen to her.
Make love with your partner's needs foremost.
Never go to bed mad.
Offer to handle an unpleasant chore.
Praise at the right time.
Quality time is a must.
Respect her feelings.
Say what you feel when you feel it.
Tell her you love her everyday. EVERYDAY,
Understand your differences.
Valentines's day is every day.
Walk together. talk together.
Xcite your partner as only you know how.
You can never say "i love you" too often.
Zero-in on her little passions.
Be there for her. always.
Create an evironment of love.
Do it. now.
Escape from the society.
Fight fair.
Give of your time.
Handle with care.
Inspire your partner with your thoughts.
Judge not.
Keep your good memories alive.
Listen to her.
Make love with your partner's needs foremost.
Never go to bed mad.
Offer to handle an unpleasant chore.
Praise at the right time.
Quality time is a must.
Respect her feelings.
Say what you feel when you feel it.
Tell her you love her everyday. EVERYDAY,
Understand your differences.
Valentines's day is every day.
Walk together. talk together.
Xcite your partner as only you know how.
You can never say "i love you" too often.
Zero-in on her little passions.
Friday, July 16, 2010
To all my friends
You gave me words of kindness
tied with a ribbon of gold,
hearing them was important
to heal my heart and soul.
Your gift of words made a difference
when I was down and blue,
questioning why I bother,
doing what I do.
Life can be a challenge
sometimes it seems unfair,
but when I was tired and struggling
it helped that you were there.
What can I give you in return
your friendship is so dear,
please know if you ever need me
I will always be here.
Kind words and time are needed
by people everywhere,
when wrapped with a smile or a hug
they're a gift that says I CARE!
tied with a ribbon of gold,
hearing them was important
to heal my heart and soul.
Your gift of words made a difference
when I was down and blue,
questioning why I bother,
doing what I do.
Life can be a challenge
sometimes it seems unfair,
but when I was tired and struggling
it helped that you were there.
What can I give you in return
your friendship is so dear,
please know if you ever need me
I will always be here.
Kind words and time are needed
by people everywhere,
when wrapped with a smile or a hug
they're a gift that says I CARE!
Take hold of EVERY moment
A friend of mine opened his wife's underwear drawer and picked up a silk paper wrapped package: "This, - he said - isn't any ordinary package." He unwrapped the box and stared at both the silk paper and the box. "She got this the first time we went to New York ,8 or 9 years ago. She has never put it on, was saving it for a special occasion. Well, I guess this is it. He got near the bed and placed the gift box next to the other clothing he was taking to the funeral house, his wife had just died. He turned to me and said: "Never save something for a special occasion. Every day in your life is a special occasion".
I still think those words changed my life. Now I read more and clean less. I sit on the porch without worrying about anything. I spend more time with my family, and less at work. I understood that life should be a source of experience to be lived up to, not survived through. I no longer keep anything. I use crystal glasses every day.. I'll wear new clothes to go to the supermarket, if I feel like it. I don't save my special perfume for special occasions; I use it whenever I want to.
The words "Someday..." and "One Day..." are fading away from my dictionary. If it's worth seeing, listening or doing, I want to see, listen or do it now. I don't know what my friend's wife would have done if she knew she wouldn't be there the next morning, this nobody can tell. I think she might have called her relatives and closest friends.
She might call old friends to make peace over past quarrels. I'd like to think she would go out for Chinese, her favorite food. It's these small things that I would regret not doing, if I knew my time had come.
I would regret it, because I would no longer see the friends I would meet, letters... that I wanted to write "One of these days". I would regret and feel sad, because I didn't say to my brother and sisters, son and daughters, not times enough at least, how much I love them.
Now, I try not to delay, postpone or keep anything that could bring laughter and joy into our lives..
And, on each morning, I say to myself that this could be a special day..
Each day, each hour, each minute, is special.
As you read this, it's because someone cares for all of you and because, probably, there's someone you care about. If you're too busy to send this out to other people and you say to yourself that you will send it "One of these days", remember that "One day" is far away... or might never come... So share!
I still think those words changed my life. Now I read more and clean less. I sit on the porch without worrying about anything. I spend more time with my family, and less at work. I understood that life should be a source of experience to be lived up to, not survived through. I no longer keep anything. I use crystal glasses every day.. I'll wear new clothes to go to the supermarket, if I feel like it. I don't save my special perfume for special occasions; I use it whenever I want to.
The words "Someday..." and "One Day..." are fading away from my dictionary. If it's worth seeing, listening or doing, I want to see, listen or do it now. I don't know what my friend's wife would have done if she knew she wouldn't be there the next morning, this nobody can tell. I think she might have called her relatives and closest friends.
She might call old friends to make peace over past quarrels. I'd like to think she would go out for Chinese, her favorite food. It's these small things that I would regret not doing, if I knew my time had come.
I would regret it, because I would no longer see the friends I would meet, letters... that I wanted to write "One of these days". I would regret and feel sad, because I didn't say to my brother and sisters, son and daughters, not times enough at least, how much I love them.
Now, I try not to delay, postpone or keep anything that could bring laughter and joy into our lives..
And, on each morning, I say to myself that this could be a special day..
Each day, each hour, each minute, is special.
As you read this, it's because someone cares for all of you and because, probably, there's someone you care about. If you're too busy to send this out to other people and you say to yourself that you will send it "One of these days", remember that "One day" is far away... or might never come... So share!
What LIFE is about
Life isn't about keeping score.
It's about whom you love and whom you hurt.
It's about whom you make happy or unhappy purposefully.
It's about friendship, used as a sanctity or a weapon.
It's about what you say and mean, maybe hurtful,
maybe heartening.
It's about what judgments you pass and why.
And who your judgments are spread to.
It's about whom you've ignored with full control and
intention.
It's about jealousy, fear, ignorance, and revenge.
It's about carrying inner hate and love,
letting it grow, and spreading it.
But most of all,
Life is about using your life to touch or poison other
people's hearts in such a way that could have never
occurred alone.
Only you choose the way those hearts are affected,
And those choices are what life's all about.
It's about whom you love and whom you hurt.
It's about whom you make happy or unhappy purposefully.
It's about friendship, used as a sanctity or a weapon.
It's about what you say and mean, maybe hurtful,
maybe heartening.
It's about what judgments you pass and why.
And who your judgments are spread to.
It's about whom you've ignored with full control and
intention.
It's about jealousy, fear, ignorance, and revenge.
It's about carrying inner hate and love,
letting it grow, and spreading it.
But most of all,
Life is about using your life to touch or poison other
people's hearts in such a way that could have never
occurred alone.
Only you choose the way those hearts are affected,
And those choices are what life's all about.
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
Law of the Seeds
Take a look at an apple tree.
There might be about 500 fruits on the tree and each apple has about 10 seeds.
So, that's a lot of seeds there, isn't it?
Question to ask would be,"Why would you need so many seeds to grow another tree, or even two?"
Mother Nature is trying to teach us something here.
She's telling us,"Not ALL seeds grow.
In Life, most seeds NEVER grow."
So, if you want to succeed at something, you have to give it a go more than ONCE.
This might mean:
TWENTY interviews to get that one great job.
You'll have to interview FORTY people to find that ONE good employee.
You'll have to talk to FIFTY people to sell that ONE house, or ONE car, or ONE electrical appliance, or ONE insurance policy, or ONE unit trust investment, or A business idea.
And you'll probably meet MORE than a HUNDRED people before you meet a good special friend.
When we understand The Law of the Seed, we don't get dissappointed.
We STOP feeling like VICTIMS.
We LEARN how to DEAL with things happening to us.
Laws of Nature are not to be taken personally.
We just need to UNDERSTAND them, AND work with them.
In a nutshell, SUCCESSFUL people FAIL more OFTEN.
But they plant MORE SEEDS.
When things are beyond your control, as most things in LIFE will be, you have to do this ONE thing as to not be miserable in your life:
You must NOT decide HOW you think the world SHOULD be.
You must not make RULES for how everyone should behave.
For when people don't obey your "rules", you would get angry for NOTHING.
For that's what miserable people usually do, they'll rant and rave.
On the other hand, let's say you EXPECT that:
Friends SHOULD return favors.
People SHOULD appreciate you.
Planes SHOULD arrive on time. (Are you listening, Tony?)
Everyone SHOULD be honest. (yeah, if only...)
Your spouse or your best friends SHOULD remember your birthday.
REASONABLE expectations?
But most of the time, these things NEVER happen!
So you'll end up frustrated and dissappointed.
There's a BETTER way:
Demand LESS, but INSTEAD,
have PREFERENCES.
For things beyond your control, tell yourself:
"I would prefer this.........., but if THAT happens, it's ok too!"
So, it's about changing your MINDSET.
It's a shift in your ATTITUDE, and it'll give you PEACE of mind.
You prefer that people are polite, but if they're rude, it doesn't ruin your day.
You prefer sunshine, but if it rains, that's not the end of the world.
To become happier, we either need to:
a) Change the WORLD, or
b) Change our thinking
I'm sure you know that it's easier to change yourselves.
So, the main ISSUE is not the problem that's happening to you, but rather it's your
ATTITUDE attending to the problem that will be the main issue.
It's not what happens to you that determines your happiness.
It's HOW you think about what happens to you.
Have a good life ahead of you.
There might be about 500 fruits on the tree and each apple has about 10 seeds.
So, that's a lot of seeds there, isn't it?
Question to ask would be,"Why would you need so many seeds to grow another tree, or even two?"
Mother Nature is trying to teach us something here.
She's telling us,"Not ALL seeds grow.
In Life, most seeds NEVER grow."
So, if you want to succeed at something, you have to give it a go more than ONCE.
This might mean:
TWENTY interviews to get that one great job.
You'll have to interview FORTY people to find that ONE good employee.
You'll have to talk to FIFTY people to sell that ONE house, or ONE car, or ONE electrical appliance, or ONE insurance policy, or ONE unit trust investment, or A business idea.
And you'll probably meet MORE than a HUNDRED people before you meet a good special friend.
When we understand The Law of the Seed, we don't get dissappointed.
We STOP feeling like VICTIMS.
We LEARN how to DEAL with things happening to us.
Laws of Nature are not to be taken personally.
We just need to UNDERSTAND them, AND work with them.
In a nutshell, SUCCESSFUL people FAIL more OFTEN.
But they plant MORE SEEDS.
When things are beyond your control, as most things in LIFE will be, you have to do this ONE thing as to not be miserable in your life:
You must NOT decide HOW you think the world SHOULD be.
You must not make RULES for how everyone should behave.
For when people don't obey your "rules", you would get angry for NOTHING.
For that's what miserable people usually do, they'll rant and rave.
On the other hand, let's say you EXPECT that:
Friends SHOULD return favors.
People SHOULD appreciate you.
Planes SHOULD arrive on time. (Are you listening, Tony?)
Everyone SHOULD be honest. (yeah, if only...)
Your spouse or your best friends SHOULD remember your birthday.
REASONABLE expectations?
But most of the time, these things NEVER happen!
So you'll end up frustrated and dissappointed.
There's a BETTER way:
Demand LESS, but INSTEAD,
have PREFERENCES.
For things beyond your control, tell yourself:
"I would prefer this.........., but if THAT happens, it's ok too!"
So, it's about changing your MINDSET.
It's a shift in your ATTITUDE, and it'll give you PEACE of mind.
You prefer that people are polite, but if they're rude, it doesn't ruin your day.
You prefer sunshine, but if it rains, that's not the end of the world.
To become happier, we either need to:
a) Change the WORLD, or
b) Change our thinking
I'm sure you know that it's easier to change yourselves.
So, the main ISSUE is not the problem that's happening to you, but rather it's your
ATTITUDE attending to the problem that will be the main issue.
It's not what happens to you that determines your happiness.
It's HOW you think about what happens to you.
Have a good life ahead of you.
The 3 sins of negative thinking
I got this from Janice, my Public Mutual agency manager.
1. I will be happy once I have _____ (or once I earn X).
Problem: If you think you can't be happy until you reach a certain point, or until you reach a certain income, or have a certain type of house or car or computer setup, you'll never be happy. That elusive goal is always just out of reach. Once we reach those goals, we are not satisfied — we want more.
Solution: Learn to be happy with what you have, where you are, and who you are, right at this moment. Happiness doesn't have to be some state that we want to get to eventually — it can be found right now. Learn to count your blessings, and see the positive in your situation. This might sound simplistic, but it works.
2. I wish I were as ____ as (a celebrity, friend, co-worker).
Problem: We'll never be as pretty, as talented, as rich, as sculpted, as cool, as everyone else. There will always be someone better, if you look hard enough. Therefore, if we compare ourselves to others like this, we will always pale, and will always fail, and will always feel bad about ourselves. This is no way to be happy.
Solution: Stop comparing yourself to others, and look instead at yourself — what are your strengths, your accomplishments, your successes, however small? What do you love about yourself? Learn to love who you are, right now, not who you want to become. There is good in each of us, love in each of us, and a wonderful human spirit in every one of us.
3. Seeing others becoming successful makes me jealous and resentful.
Problem: First, this assumes that only a small number of people can be successful. In truth, many, many people can be successful — in different ways.
Solution: Learn to admire the success of others, and learn from it, and be happy for them, by empathizing with them and understanding what it must be like to be them. And then turn away from them, and look at yourself — you can be successful too, in whatever you choose to do. And even more, you already are successful. Look not at those above you in the social ladder, but those below you — there are always millions of people worse off than you, people who couldn't even read this article or afford a computer.
In that light, you are a huge success.
1. I will be happy once I have _____ (or once I earn X).
Problem: If you think you can't be happy until you reach a certain point, or until you reach a certain income, or have a certain type of house or car or computer setup, you'll never be happy. That elusive goal is always just out of reach. Once we reach those goals, we are not satisfied — we want more.
Solution: Learn to be happy with what you have, where you are, and who you are, right at this moment. Happiness doesn't have to be some state that we want to get to eventually — it can be found right now. Learn to count your blessings, and see the positive in your situation. This might sound simplistic, but it works.
2. I wish I were as ____ as (a celebrity, friend, co-worker).
Problem: We'll never be as pretty, as talented, as rich, as sculpted, as cool, as everyone else. There will always be someone better, if you look hard enough. Therefore, if we compare ourselves to others like this, we will always pale, and will always fail, and will always feel bad about ourselves. This is no way to be happy.
Solution: Stop comparing yourself to others, and look instead at yourself — what are your strengths, your accomplishments, your successes, however small? What do you love about yourself? Learn to love who you are, right now, not who you want to become. There is good in each of us, love in each of us, and a wonderful human spirit in every one of us.
3. Seeing others becoming successful makes me jealous and resentful.
Problem: First, this assumes that only a small number of people can be successful. In truth, many, many people can be successful — in different ways.
Solution: Learn to admire the success of others, and learn from it, and be happy for them, by empathizing with them and understanding what it must be like to be them. And then turn away from them, and look at yourself — you can be successful too, in whatever you choose to do. And even more, you already are successful. Look not at those above you in the social ladder, but those below you — there are always millions of people worse off than you, people who couldn't even read this article or afford a computer.
In that light, you are a huge success.
Quote of the Day
Every great man is always being helped by everybody; for his gift is to get good out of all things and all persons.
-- John Ruskin
-- John Ruskin
Saturday, July 10, 2010
Definition of strength
Repost:
The strength of a man isn't seen in the width of his shoulders.
Its seen in the width of his arms that circle you.
The strength of a man isn't in the deep tone of his voice.
It is in the gentle words he whispers.
The strength of a man isn't how many buddies he has.
Its how good a buddy he is with his kids.
The strength of a man isn't in how respected he is at work.
It's in how respected he is at home.
The strength of a man isn't in how hard he hits.
It's in how tender he touches.
The strength of a man isn't in the hair on his chest.
Its in his Heart...that lies within his chest.
The strength of a man isn't how many women he's Loved.
It's in whether he can be true to one woman.
The strength of a man isn't in the weight he can lift.
It is in the burdens he can carry.
The strength of a man isn't seen in the width of his shoulders.
Its seen in the width of his arms that circle you.
The strength of a man isn't in the deep tone of his voice.
It is in the gentle words he whispers.
The strength of a man isn't how many buddies he has.
Its how good a buddy he is with his kids.
The strength of a man isn't in how respected he is at work.
It's in how respected he is at home.
The strength of a man isn't in how hard he hits.
It's in how tender he touches.
The strength of a man isn't in the hair on his chest.
Its in his Heart...that lies within his chest.
The strength of a man isn't how many women he's Loved.
It's in whether he can be true to one woman.
The strength of a man isn't in the weight he can lift.
It is in the burdens he can carry.
Friday, July 09, 2010
Great parenting article from Salon
Read it and you'll understand why so many parents are getting it WRONG!
Joyless parents: You're doing it wrong
New York magazine's report on the misery of modern parenthood misses the point: Babies aren't a happy ending
By Gwynne Watkins
Jessica Todd Harper, New York Magazine"I Love My Children. I Hate My Life."
That's the cover line on this week's New York magazine, superimposed on a photo of a beautiful mother and infant in a sun-drenched landscape. Presumably, the mother is loving her child and hating her life. Presumably, we all are. Jennifer Senior's article "All Joy and No Fun: Why Parents Hate Parenting" attempts to rip off the veil and expose modern parenting for what it really is: endless drudgery accompanied by moments of transcendent joy. The article cites multiple studies demonstrating that people are fundamentally less happy after they have children. (Unless they're Danish. Apparently being Scandinavian gets you a pass.) Parenting, Senior concludes, is stressful, agonizing work that can only be appreciated in retrospect.
And all I can think in response is, You're doing it wrong.
This is not to say that I possess some happy-parenting secret that has eluded all the rich white people cited in Senior's article. But I disagree with her thesis that parents are dissatisfied because "the experience of raising children has fundamentally changed." To me, the experience of raising children seems fundamentally the same as it's always been. It's our expectations of the experience that have changed.
Having children, as the New York article points out, was once an economic necessity: Parents needed the free labor that a large family provided. But thanks to industrialization and advances in contraception, children gradually stopped being a given and started being an option. With every generation, the child-free life has become more socially acceptable ... and more appealing. So those of us who opt to have children now have to justify the decision, not just to the outside world, but to ourselves. In recent years, we seem to have reconciled this problem by viewing children as a path to personal fulfillment. Somewhere along the line, having a baby has stopped being an inevitable part of the life cycle and started to be one of those things-to-do-before-you-die, like climbing Machu Picchu or running a marathon. Basic aspects of the mothering experience, like labor and breast-feeding, took on a spiritual significance. Now, as we prepare to make the many sacrifices necessary to become parents, we anticipate nothing less than enlightenment in return.
But being a parent isn't about getting a happy ending. There is no ending. As soon as your child is born, the profound truth hits you: this is forever. And yet, if New York magazine is to be believed, modern parents never stop obsessing about whether they're doing everything they can to make their children the most accomplished little people they can possibly be. It's as if they're expecting to cross a finish line any day and be showered with confetti. And in the meantime, they don't realize that they're missing out.
If you're having a baby for reasons of self-gratification, of course you're going to be miserable. Becoming a parent is less about enriching your life than it is about up-ending it entirely to make room for another human being. And that's what Senior's article is missing: the fact that children are people, and having a child is about forging a relationship. Take this quote from a sociologist Senior interviewed about why parents are so disgruntled: "Middle-class parents spend much more time talking to children, answering questions with questions, and treating each child's thought as a special contribution. And this is very tiring work." Funny, that doesn't sound like work; that sounds like having a conversation. The true reward of parenting isn't looking back with nostalgia, as Senior concludes; it's getting to watch a baby turn into a fully realized person. It's hearing the thoughts and opinions of somebody who didn't exist until you brought them into the world. It's a humbling, daunting, awesome experience -- and it's hard enough without the added pressure of making every moment enriching and significant.
Back when I had a newborn, I asked my Brooklyn lactation consultant what breast-feeding problem was most common. To my surprise, she didn't talk about bad latches or sore nipples. "I see so many women who are so worried about doing it right," she sighed, "that they forget to enjoy their babies." Put that way, it sounds so simple.
Joyless parents: You're doing it wrong
New York magazine's report on the misery of modern parenthood misses the point: Babies aren't a happy ending
By Gwynne Watkins
Jessica Todd Harper, New York Magazine"I Love My Children. I Hate My Life."
That's the cover line on this week's New York magazine, superimposed on a photo of a beautiful mother and infant in a sun-drenched landscape. Presumably, the mother is loving her child and hating her life. Presumably, we all are. Jennifer Senior's article "All Joy and No Fun: Why Parents Hate Parenting" attempts to rip off the veil and expose modern parenting for what it really is: endless drudgery accompanied by moments of transcendent joy. The article cites multiple studies demonstrating that people are fundamentally less happy after they have children. (Unless they're Danish. Apparently being Scandinavian gets you a pass.) Parenting, Senior concludes, is stressful, agonizing work that can only be appreciated in retrospect.
And all I can think in response is, You're doing it wrong.
This is not to say that I possess some happy-parenting secret that has eluded all the rich white people cited in Senior's article. But I disagree with her thesis that parents are dissatisfied because "the experience of raising children has fundamentally changed." To me, the experience of raising children seems fundamentally the same as it's always been. It's our expectations of the experience that have changed.
Having children, as the New York article points out, was once an economic necessity: Parents needed the free labor that a large family provided. But thanks to industrialization and advances in contraception, children gradually stopped being a given and started being an option. With every generation, the child-free life has become more socially acceptable ... and more appealing. So those of us who opt to have children now have to justify the decision, not just to the outside world, but to ourselves. In recent years, we seem to have reconciled this problem by viewing children as a path to personal fulfillment. Somewhere along the line, having a baby has stopped being an inevitable part of the life cycle and started to be one of those things-to-do-before-you-die, like climbing Machu Picchu or running a marathon. Basic aspects of the mothering experience, like labor and breast-feeding, took on a spiritual significance. Now, as we prepare to make the many sacrifices necessary to become parents, we anticipate nothing less than enlightenment in return.
But being a parent isn't about getting a happy ending. There is no ending. As soon as your child is born, the profound truth hits you: this is forever. And yet, if New York magazine is to be believed, modern parents never stop obsessing about whether they're doing everything they can to make their children the most accomplished little people they can possibly be. It's as if they're expecting to cross a finish line any day and be showered with confetti. And in the meantime, they don't realize that they're missing out.
If you're having a baby for reasons of self-gratification, of course you're going to be miserable. Becoming a parent is less about enriching your life than it is about up-ending it entirely to make room for another human being. And that's what Senior's article is missing: the fact that children are people, and having a child is about forging a relationship. Take this quote from a sociologist Senior interviewed about why parents are so disgruntled: "Middle-class parents spend much more time talking to children, answering questions with questions, and treating each child's thought as a special contribution. And this is very tiring work." Funny, that doesn't sound like work; that sounds like having a conversation. The true reward of parenting isn't looking back with nostalgia, as Senior concludes; it's getting to watch a baby turn into a fully realized person. It's hearing the thoughts and opinions of somebody who didn't exist until you brought them into the world. It's a humbling, daunting, awesome experience -- and it's hard enough without the added pressure of making every moment enriching and significant.
Back when I had a newborn, I asked my Brooklyn lactation consultant what breast-feeding problem was most common. To my surprise, she didn't talk about bad latches or sore nipples. "I see so many women who are so worried about doing it right," she sighed, "that they forget to enjoy their babies." Put that way, it sounds so simple.
All you need is LOVE
Being a father of three, I am always pressed for time.
I truly believe that even though I'm a millionaire, but I will be a total failure if I'm a horrible dad.
Thus, the most important lesson to impart to my kids is LOVE.
If I live in a house of spotless beauty with everthing in its place, but have not love, I am a housekeeper --not a homemaker.
If I have time for waxing, polishing, and decorative achievements, but have not love, my children learn cleanliness--not godliness.
Love leaves the dust in search of a child's laugh. Love smiles at the tiny fingerprints on a newly cleaned window.
Love wipes away the tears before it wipes up the spilled milk. Love picks up the child before it picks up the toys.
Love is present through the trials. Love reprimands, reproves, and is responsive. Love crawls with the baby, walks with the toddler, runs with the child, then stands aside to let the youth walk into adulthood.
Love is the key that opens salvation's message to a child's heart.
Before I became a parent, I took glory in my house of perfection.
Now I glory in God's perfection of my child.
As a father, there is much I must teach my child, but the greatest of all is love.
I truly believe that even though I'm a millionaire, but I will be a total failure if I'm a horrible dad.
Thus, the most important lesson to impart to my kids is LOVE.
If I live in a house of spotless beauty with everthing in its place, but have not love, I am a housekeeper --not a homemaker.
If I have time for waxing, polishing, and decorative achievements, but have not love, my children learn cleanliness--not godliness.
Love leaves the dust in search of a child's laugh. Love smiles at the tiny fingerprints on a newly cleaned window.
Love wipes away the tears before it wipes up the spilled milk. Love picks up the child before it picks up the toys.
Love is present through the trials. Love reprimands, reproves, and is responsive. Love crawls with the baby, walks with the toddler, runs with the child, then stands aside to let the youth walk into adulthood.
Love is the key that opens salvation's message to a child's heart.
Before I became a parent, I took glory in my house of perfection.
Now I glory in God's perfection of my child.
As a father, there is much I must teach my child, but the greatest of all is love.
Why worry
Being a business owner, I have had sleepless nights. Thinking out the next A&P campaign, the right product mix, HR issues etc.
Worrying is an everyday staple.
Then I read this poem by Cynthia Groopman.
Worry not
Worry not, dear ones,
Do not rob yourself of joy and fun.
Life should be for rejoicing and for pleasure,
Savour each moment in mirthful measure.
Worry not, my dear ones,
Life battles with God's help you have successfully won.
Remember that worry will not be a solution but will cause lots of stress,
Weakening your spirit and denying you with quiet rest.
Just look at the rainbow of hope,
With prayers, and faith and courage, you will successfully overcome and cope.
Worrying is an everyday staple.
Then I read this poem by Cynthia Groopman.
Worry not
Worry not, dear ones,
Do not rob yourself of joy and fun.
Life should be for rejoicing and for pleasure,
Savour each moment in mirthful measure.
Worry not, my dear ones,
Life battles with God's help you have successfully won.
Remember that worry will not be a solution but will cause lots of stress,
Weakening your spirit and denying you with quiet rest.
Just look at the rainbow of hope,
With prayers, and faith and courage, you will successfully overcome and cope.
Friday, July 02, 2010
A tribute to my Dad
I know it's 2 weeks too late, but I just emailed my Dad and I wanted to keep this memory.
By Joseph J. Mazzella
Hi Dad.
By Joseph J. Mazzella
Hi Dad.
I just wanted to write you a little note to thank you for all the things you have done
for me over the years, but I realized if I did that it would be a whole book. I hope you don’t mind
then if I just hit the highlights.
Thanks Dad for having the good sense to marry Mom all those years ago. You couldn’t have
chosen a better wife or mother for all of us.
for me over the years, but I realized if I did that it would be a whole book. I hope you don’t mind
then if I just hit the highlights.
Thanks Dad for having the good sense to marry Mom all those years ago. You couldn’t have
chosen a better wife or mother for all of us.
Thanks Dad for not stopping at two kids or else I wouldn’t be here today. Thanks Dad for that stack of books you kept in the corner of the living room. It got me reading early and I haven’t stopped since. Thanks for everyone of those dinners over the years. They were food for both the stomach and the soul. Thanks too for giving me your old car. You kept me driving instead of walking or riding.
Thanks Dad for always encouraging me and supporting my choices even when I made the
wrong ones. Thanks for always being there to talk to when I had problems and pain. You helped
me through a lot more than you know over the years. Thanks for being such a great dad to all
your kids and such a loving grandfather to all of your grandchildren.
Thanks so much Dad for being there through laughter and tears, triumph and tragedy, love
and loss, happiness and heartbreak. I am so happy that you were my Dad. You taught me how to
always be there for my own children. You showed me how to be a good man. You helped me to
find my way through life and back to love, joy, and God. Happy Father’s Day Dad. I hope that
we share many more of them together. I love you.
Thanks Dad for always encouraging me and supporting my choices even when I made the
wrong ones. Thanks for always being there to talk to when I had problems and pain. You helped
me through a lot more than you know over the years. Thanks for being such a great dad to all
your kids and such a loving grandfather to all of your grandchildren.
Thanks so much Dad for being there through laughter and tears, triumph and tragedy, love
and loss, happiness and heartbreak. I am so happy that you were my Dad. You taught me how to
always be there for my own children. You showed me how to be a good man. You helped me to
find my way through life and back to love, joy, and God. Happy Father’s Day Dad. I hope that
we share many more of them together. I love you.
What we should pray for
I asked God to take away my pain.
God said, No. It is not for me to take away your pain,
but for you to give it up.
I asked God to make that handicapped child whole.
God said, No. Her spirit is whole, her body was only
temporary.
I asked God to grant me patience.
God said, No. Patience is a by product of
tribulations; It isn't granted, it is learned.
I asked God to give me happiness
God said, No. I give you blessings. Happiness is up
to you.
I asked God to spare me pain.
God said, No. Suffering draws you apart from worldly
cares and brings you closer to me.
I asked God to make my spirit grow.
God said, No. You must grow on your own, but I will
prune you to make you fruitful.
I asked for all things that I might enjoy life.
God said, No. I will give you life so that you may
enjoy all things.
I ask God to help me LOVE others, as much as he loves
me.
God said...Ahhhh, Finally you have the idea.
Thursday, July 01, 2010
Why no one should whine and gripe
Today, upon a bus,
I saw a girl with golden hair.
I envied her, she seemed so gay,
And I wished I was as fair.
When suddenly she rose to leave,
I saw her hobble down the aisle.
She had one leg and used a crutch.
But as she passed, she gave a smile.
Oh, God, forgive me when I whine.
I have 2 legs, the world is mine.
I stopped to buy some candy.
The lad who sold it had such charm.
I talked with him, he seemed so glad.
If I were late, it'd do no harm.
And as I left, he said to me,
"I thank you, you've been so kind.
It's nice to talk with folks like you.
You see," he said, "I'm blind."
Oh, God, forgive me when I whine.
I have 2 eyes, the world is mine.
Later while walking down the street,
I saw a child with eyes of blue.
He stood and watched the others play.
He seemed not to know what to do.
I stopped a moment and then I said,
"Why don't you join the others dear?"
He looked ahead without a word.
And then I knew he couldn't hear.
Oh, God, forgive me when I whine.
I have 2 ears, the world is mine.
With feet to take me where I'd go.
With eyes to see the sunset's glow.
With ears to hear what I'd know.
Oh, God, forgive me when I whine
I've been blessed indeed, the world is mine
I saw a girl with golden hair.
I envied her, she seemed so gay,
And I wished I was as fair.
When suddenly she rose to leave,
I saw her hobble down the aisle.
She had one leg and used a crutch.
But as she passed, she gave a smile.
Oh, God, forgive me when I whine.
I have 2 legs, the world is mine.
I stopped to buy some candy.
The lad who sold it had such charm.
I talked with him, he seemed so glad.
If I were late, it'd do no harm.
And as I left, he said to me,
"I thank you, you've been so kind.
It's nice to talk with folks like you.
You see," he said, "I'm blind."
Oh, God, forgive me when I whine.
I have 2 eyes, the world is mine.
Later while walking down the street,
I saw a child with eyes of blue.
He stood and watched the others play.
He seemed not to know what to do.
I stopped a moment and then I said,
"Why don't you join the others dear?"
He looked ahead without a word.
And then I knew he couldn't hear.
Oh, God, forgive me when I whine.
I have 2 ears, the world is mine.
With feet to take me where I'd go.
With eyes to see the sunset's glow.
With ears to hear what I'd know.
Oh, God, forgive me when I whine
I've been blessed indeed, the world is mine
Shipping and life
I used to be in the shipping industry.
I had a great boss who taught us that you should always always motivate your staff to be the best.
"Shoot for the stars, for if you miss, you get the moon" he said.
Now that I'm running a business of my own with a big group of staff to feed, I have to inculcate the exact same culture into my associates.
I remember this quote:
If you want to build a ship, don't drum up people together to collect wood and don't assign them tasks and work, but rather teach them to long for the sea.
- Antoine de Saint-Exupery
I had a great boss who taught us that you should always always motivate your staff to be the best.
"Shoot for the stars, for if you miss, you get the moon" he said.
Now that I'm running a business of my own with a big group of staff to feed, I have to inculcate the exact same culture into my associates.
I remember this quote:
If you want to build a ship, don't drum up people together to collect wood and don't assign them tasks and work, but rather teach them to long for the sea.
- Antoine de Saint-Exupery
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