Tuesday, November 19, 2019

10 most important life skills

  • The skill of truly listening to others. Most people are simply waiting for their turn to speak in a given conversation. Don’t be one of them. Learn to listen to what others have to say. To internalize it and truly understand it. It will make a world of difference.
  • The skill of accepting yourself. We’re all fucked up. We all have trauma. We all have parts of ourselves that we hate. It’s simply a part of the human condition. To experience true happiness, you must learn to accept yourself as you are while you work to transform yourself into who you need to be.
  • The skill of saying “no”. Most of us allow other people’s schedules and agendas to run our lives. From our parents to our friends to our coworkers to our bosses. We’ve become a nation of “yes men” (and women” incapable of prioritizing our own needs and desires. Learn to say “no” and mean it to make more time for the things that matter.
  • The skill of being happy with where you are. Famous venture capitalist Naval Ravikant has said that, “Desire is a contract you make with yourself to be unhappy until you get what you want.” And he’s right. Most of us have more luxury, abundance, and convenience than the richest and most prosperous humans of the last thousand years. But we’re completely miserable. You must learn to be happy with where you are. To appreciate your stage in the journey of life while you work toward your goals and ambitions. Happiness is a choice. So choose happiness.
  • The skill of authenticity. Most people think of authenticity as something you “have” or “don’t have”. But authenticity is a skill and a choice. You must learn how to act in alignment with what you really value, to shut out the noise of society, and to listen to your higher self. Although we are all born with this skill, the world beats it out of us by the time we hit puberty and it’s up to you to strengthen it once again.
  • The skill of selecting the right romantic partners. Nothing will have a bigger impact, for better or worse, than the person with whom you choose to share your life. The problem is, most people are horrible at selecting the right romantic partner for themselves. To develop this skill, you must first gain a clear understanding of who you are and what you value and seek partners who align with your vision and values. If you do not learn this skill, you’re in for a world of hurt.
  • The skill of relaxing and being. Most of us struggle to simply be. We think we have to be doing something all the time to be worthy of love or acceptance. But the truth is, you are enough just as you are. You must learn how to unwind and simply be present. To enjoy the experience of being human without needing to constantly be in motion. There’s a reason that both Eastern and Western philosophy claim presence is the ultimate form of enlightenment.
  • The skill of perspective. When disaster strikes, it’s easy to believe that our world is ending. That the universe hates us. That everything is going to hell in a handbasket. But the simple truth is that—baring death or catastrophic injury—very few things matter as much as we pretend they do. You’re going to be fine and the worst-case scenario is still better than what 50% of the population faces on a daily basis. Never lose sight of this.
  • The skill of resilience. Most people assume that tough, mentally strong, and disciplined people were simply “born that way”. But after interviewing 400+ of the world’s highest achievers, I’ve learned that nothing could be further from the truth. Resilience and disciplines are skills. Skills that take time, pain, and persistent inoculation against stress. (Go take cold showers for 30 days and you’ll see what I mean).
  • The skill of speaking your truth. To live the happiest life possible, you must live in integrity with your truth. You must own who you are, what you believe, and what you want without fear or reservation. And you must develop the skill of speaking your truth with kindness…even (and especially) when it’s hard. As the old saying goes, “The truth will set you free”

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