50 unwritten rules

1. Always say thank you, sorry , when it's needed.
2. Never break a promise. When you swear something, when you promise it, do everything to keep your word.
3. Wearing headphones in public is a code to say "do not talk to me". So if someone is wearing it, do not talk to him.
4. Always be nice, especially to those who bring you food.
5. In all the negotiations that you do (in family, between friend and especially in business), do it in writing. Sign a contract.
6. When you meet someone, be sure to have a firm handshake.
7. When someone walks his dog and approaches you, ask permission before stroking the animal.
8. Do not flatter proudly, let alone around people.
9. Do not play with your phone when you are around people or in a public place.
10. When you post something vulgar or insult someone on the Internet, it says more about you than the person you insult.
11. If you have borrowed something, make it right after using it.
12. Everyone needs a personal space, a moment of their own.
13. Prefer the phone call rather than messages during a formal discussion.
14. Be quiet when other people are sleeping. This means not to talk, not to slam the doors, close the drawers with caution, etc etc
15. Put things back in their place - both at home and at the store.
16. If you are finishing the toilet paper at work or at home, be sure to bring another roll or be sure that people know that there is no more.
17. Have a healthy lifestyle (be clean)
18. Always hold the door for the elderly - your parents including
19. Do not sneeze and cough in the direction of people, neither in your hand, but in your elbow
20. Do not raise your voice when you talk to your parents and do not be vulgar with them.
21. You will not comment on the baby making noise in the movies. At the limit, you will see security.
22. When you go to someone's home, never look at their computer, their room, their drawers or their fridge without their permission.
23. When you know someone for a long time, as long as they do not try to talk about it themselves, never ask them about their age or salary.
24. Do not embarrass your host by asking him something he probably does not have.
25. When you wait for a visit, make arrangements to make them feel welcome.
26. When someone brings you to the restaurant, always wait for that person to order first. Look at the price of the dish he picks and line up.
27. Do not let your guests set the table, unless they insist.
28. Never hit anyone. But if things go wrong and he starts to hit you, try not to take the first shots. And replicate, loudly.
29. If you are parents and the friends of your children come home: For dinner, do not sit with them. They will not ask for food if you are there.
30. Do not judge people by the way they dress or because of their religion 
31. Living with your parents is not ok, live in your own home when you grow up 
32. Do not ask about someone else's religion, about their political opinions, unless they are open to talking about it.
33. When you have to pay at the cash desk, pay with change when it comes to a small purchase (a few cents or euros) and not with the credit card.
34. You can not blame society for your failures.
35. Always answer people you know and your friends. If you see the message, answer, make the habit. Otherwise, put the phone away to not see the message
36. Each office will have people with different ethnicities. If you eat all together, do not speak in your native language.
37. Do not look at others' toilets, it's uncomfortable, irritating and boring.
38. In public transport, listen to music in your headphones. (Initially, I did not understand this advice - But after several indications by readers, it would be not to listen to his music on a speaker but rather on headphones, not to disturb)
39. If you call in a public place, always speak quietly and calmly so as not to disturb people around you.
40. Do not smoke while walking. It's painful for people behind. Better yet, don't smoke at all.
41. If you have to turn right, make sure to be in the right lane - no "I pass from left to right directly by cutting the road to people behind"
42. The highway code is important. Follow the rules of the road and traffic lights.
43. Listen, always watch and always be ready to improve the situation.
44. Avoid staying in someone's home for more than three days. No matter how close you are to this person, you change their everyday life and their personal lives.
45. Have confidence in your life. It will be a blessing of the gods during hard times, urgency, depression or hardship.
46. If you borrow a car, return it with full fuel if necessary.
47. Wish the cashier a good day. A smile will not cost you anything.
48. Consider the very people who are below you (hierarchically or otherwise). In short, be humble and modest.
49. Do not judge people by their gender. Everyone has the same rights, and can live as he sees fit.
50. Women are not sexual objects. Treat women as human beings.

6 habits best to have

1. Self-knowledge.

It's pretty hard to become a better version of yourself if you don't know what you are improving on. To map out your journey you need a starting point as well as destination. And because you change all the time, you should study yourself all the time.

“Success in the knowledge economy comes to those who know themselves–their strengths, their values, and how they best perform.” — Peter F. Drucker

The habits that can help you in this area:

a) Meditation

There are zillions of benefits to meditation, including increased focus and finishing at a lower blood pressure. Of these, I consider self-awareness the biggest benefit. Usually, you just automatically respond to your subconscious thoughts. Meditation makes you aware of those thinking patterns and allows you to step between the impulse and your response.

b) Journaling

Capturing your self-talk on paper is very enlightening. It's a powerful tool to clarify your thoughts and to gather plenty of data on yourself.

I journal six days a week and review my entries on Sundays. Sometimes, I write about my emotions and recent events, but always from the perspective of asking why this small trigger released such a strong emotion or what caused me to behave in such a way yesterday.

But most often, I simply research my internal world, journaling about my doubts, dreams, fears, aspirations, etc.

While meditation gives you self-knowledge on emotional level, journaling gives it on both emotional and intellectual levels.

2. Health.

A successful person rarely doesn’t care about their health. It was more common in the past, when people moved more and were eating real food, not the semi-chemical crap we consume now.

But even back then folks like Benjamin Franklin recognized the importance of exercise and diet. Nowadays, health and success are almost synonyms. Of course, you can be sick and still become a better version of yourself. It is simply much fricking harder.

I'm a very healthy person, but I don’t sell as many books as she does. I cannot imagine how I could’ve succeeded with my books while battling with constant pain and dozens of pesky afflictions connected to her disease.

With today's health fad we all know what to do to improve our health. You know it too. It's time to do, instead of contemplating.

a) Exercise

Every single day. We are spiritual creatures in physical bodies. We need to move our bodies to stay in decent shape.

b) Eat Well

There are plenty of different diets. Some of them come from religion or lifestyle choices. But there is one truly healthy rule: eat as many unprocessed foods as possible.

What's "processed?" You know this as well. An apple was on a tree a few days ago. A pizza was not.

c) Sleep Well

Eight hours a night is a rule of thumb. Sleep needs are individual. 

Humans in natural conditions sleep 6.5 to 7.25 hours.

Find your sleep needs and get enough sleep.

d) Stay Hydrated

Dehydration is one of the modern world's curses. Another rule of thumb is drink 8x8 ounces or 2 litres of water a day. Those needs are individual too. A tiny gal needs less water than 7-feet ogre.

And don't drink empty calories (soda). That's not a path to good health.

3. Networking.

Successful people deliberately network with others.

“Your network is your net worth.” ― Tim Sanders

Your worth is not only monetary. I think, the financial aspect is the least important. Your self-worth is determined to a huge degree by the people you associate with. Successful people understand that and that's their primary motivation for cultivating their network.

Helpful habits:

a) Thank You Notes

People don't even take time to thank others nowadays. You will stand out using this simple technique. Handwritten thank-you notes are more powerful. They’re rare in the digital age.

You can send a short audio or video. They’re more powerful than a simple email.

b) Testimonials

Testimonials are like public thank you notes. Write reviews, give testimonials, share them on your social media. The receiver will appreciate it.

c) Collaborate

It always pushes the envelope a bit. When you have to work on common projects your level of interaction increases naturally.

d) Spend Time

This simple networking method always works. You should apply it especially with the people you look up to. The more you can be around your mentors, the faster you will emulate them in your life.

4. Vision.

Successful people are obsessed with their vision, whatever it is. But first they need to create one. That's why I started with self-knowledge. It takes some soul searching to discover (Victor Frankl said "detect") your life mission.

Once they realize what they want to achieve, they keep that vision in front of their mind as often as possible. Average people are often amazed by the drive of successful people. But this drive is not a result of a single enlightenment, as we like to imagine. Successful people habitually refer to their vision every day.

Useful habits:

a) Personal Mission Statement

Well, you need to first create one. Once you have it, there are many methods to use it. You can read it, listen to it, repeat in your mind, visualize it and so on. The point is to refer to it every single day, so your mission is always in your mind's agenda.

b) Vision Board

Humans think in images. If you have a visual reminder of your purpose, you can look at it multiple times a day.

c) Visualization

You can simply imagine the joy of fulfilling your purpose. Visualizing yourself in the process of getting there would be even better.

5. Education.

The biggest mistake you can make is to think that you are finished learning when you earn your degree. Education is a lifelong process.

“Formal education will make you a living; self-education will make you a fortune.” – Jim Rohn

And it is you who have to take charge of your education. Today’s education systems are outdated and expansive. What is more, you need proper learning habits. It's no longer about appearing in the class 5 days a week. It's about studying on your own as often and long as needed.

Handy habits:

a) Reading

Read books, blog posts or articles in specialized magazines- whatever makes you more knowledgeable about your subject.

b) Listening

YouTube has countless hours of useful lectures, workshops and speeches. You can convert them into audio and listen to them while doing semi-mindless tasks like driving or washing dishes.

c) Watching

It's not my cup of tea, but there are people who learn well from watching videos. If that describes you, go for it.

d) Teaching

You retain more if you teach what you've just learned, because you create more associations to your knowledge. Also, your students may challenge your assumptions and you need to reflect on your knowledge base to come up with convincing arguments.

e) Doing

There is no better learning method than practice. Each time you use your knowledge you gain experience and create more associations. Practice makes you also a better teacher. Internalized knowledge is four times easier to transfer than dry theory.

6. Habits.

Successful people recognize the utmost importance of habits in their lives. They don't let their habits be a conglomerate of social and physical environment. They consciously work on avoiding bad habits and developing good ones.

“Your beliefs become your thoughts,
 Your thoughts become your words,
 Your words become your actions,
 Your actions become your habits,
 Your habits become your values,
 Your values become your destiny.”
 ― Mahatma Gandhi

I don't have useful habits here for you. My point is, you need to analyze, develop and maintain your habits. Self-knowledge and education are very handy for accomplishing that goal.

How to spread your idea

Whether you’re a businessman, politician, musician, or artist – your success depends on your ability to get your ideas to spread to large amounts of people.

But how do you get them to pay attention to your ideas?

And how do you get people to share your message, and actually care about it?

  

The more your idea fits this recipe, the more likely it is to be successful.

1. Social Currency

We share things to look good.

We often share information because it shows we are “in the know”

When your idea is backed by social currency,  it means there is value to sharing it with others.

It signals that we are knowledgeable, sexy, funny, or “cool”.

The idea is quite simple:

If sharing your idea or product makes people feel better about themselves (if it adds a “social benefit”) – people are gong to be more likely to share it.

Not because they love you, but because they love themselves.

2. Triggers

We share things when we are triggered to do so by something in the environment.

The more we are reminded of something, the more likely we are to share it.

This is why marketers know that it usually takes at least 7 communications to get someone to buy your stuff.

And here are some crazy examples of how triggers work:

In 1997, the candy company Mars experiences a spike in sales, even though they haven’t changed anything about their marketing.

The reason? NASA had just started a mission to Mars, and it was being reported all over the news.

The simple triggers of “Mars” influenced more people to buy the candy bar.

Another example is The Kit Kat Bar.

In 2007 they launched a Marketing Campaign to link Kit Kats and Coffee, describing the pair as “a break’s best friend”.

The campaign was very successful – sales increased, and the $300 million dollar brand grew into a $500 million brand.

This was another great trigger, because coffee is a common drink to have during mornings and work breaks. Creating this association, influenced more people to have them together.

3. Emotion

When it comes to making decisions, we are often more motivated by our emotions, than our thoughts.

Marketers and salesman understand the power behind this concept and use emotions to get people to take action.

We purchase things based on our emotions, and use logic to rationalize the purchase.

The discovery was that it didn’t matter whether the emotions were positive or negative, but rather if they were high arousal or low arousal.

High Arousal emotions are what get people to take the most action – on the positive side, it’s things like awe, inspiration, excitement, and humor. On the negative side, emotions like anger, fear, and anxiety.

Low Arousal emotions have the opposite effect. Relaxation and contentment may be positive, but they don’t drive us to take action. Same with sadness and misery – they were found to not be that motivating.

When it comes to getting people to share your stuff, the higher arousal, the better.

4. Stories

Facts are necessary and can be persuasive, but if you can use those facts to form a coherent narrative, people are going to remember that information and spread it for you.

Stories are remarkable for making ideas popular. They are easy to remember, they tug at our emotions, and they are hidden with a lot of information that can influence our decisions.

If you tell someone 100 facts to support your idea, you may convince one person.

But if you tell them just one captivating story, you will leave a stronger impact, and they will be more likely to share your idea.